Month: July 2012

50 Shades of Grey

hard to pick a favorite of the many devastating blows in this review.

What in the hell just happened? Did I really read that? Oh, my god, I did. I did read that. Ana is just a giant mess of a human being. She’s insecure to the point of it being laughable, “klutzy” (even though she only trips twice in the entire book, when it’s convenient for her to look awkward), and a complete ditz. She’s a virgin (of course) who’s never taken any sexual interest in anyone before. Right. I’m fairly certain there hasn’t been a woman this naive since ’round about 1954. At one point, she thinks putting her hair in pigtails will keep her safe from Christian’s lusty advances. Fuckin’ really? She “flushes” constantly, and on several occasions referred to her hoo-hoo-naughty place as “down there.”
Next, we have Christian Grey: Christian is a misogynistic, self-loathing, abusive piece of shit. Apparently, his only redeeming qualities are, in this order; his ridiculous good looks, his money, and his giant penis. The only time Ana seems to like him as a person is when he’s being “lovable”, and those times are few and far between. Most of the time he’s serious, brooding, and threatening. How charming.

Stagnation at the olympics

without breaking records, the olympics are utterly boring. we can now only hope for more oscar pistorius types to lead us into the future.

Many scientists have concluded from recent events that athletic performance is hitting a wall. Geoffroy Berthelot of INSEP, a sports research institute in Paris, looked at competitions from 1896 to 2007 and found that peak scores stopped improving in 64% of track and field events after 1993. Giuseppe Lippi of the University of Verona examined 9 Olympic sports from 1900 to 2007 and found similar results. “Improvement has substantially stopped or reached a plateau in several specialities,” he wrote. Berthelot has predicted that the “human species’ physiological frontiers will be reached” in most sports around 2027.

Secure pet names

Popular pet names Rover, Cheryl and Kate could be a thing of the past. Banks are now advising parents to think carefully before naming their child’s first pet. For security reasons, the chosen name should have at least 8 characters, a capital letter and a digit. It should not be the same as the name of any previous pet, and must never be written down, especially on a collar as that is the first place anyone would look. Ideally, children should consider changing the name of their pet every 12 weeks.